A hypocrite is one who sets good examples only when he has an audience.
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Vacation: a period of travel and relaxation when you take twice the clothes and half the money you need.
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Tomorrow (noun): a mystical land where 99% of all human productivity, motivation and achievement is stored.
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It's been "one of those days" for like 3 years now.
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We are young only once, after that we need some other excuse.
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The world is divided into two kinds of people: those who have tattoos, and those who are afraid of people with tattoos.
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Hockey players wear numbers because you can't always identify the body with dental records.
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Give blood. Play hockey.
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Cinderella is proof that a new pair of shoes can change your life.
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A smile is the light in the window of your face that tells people you're home.
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We lose ourselves in books. We find ourselves there too.
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The man who stops advertising to save money is the man who stops the clock to save time.
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Teamwork is essential -- it allows you to blame someone else.
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A teenager is someone who is well prepared for a zombie attack but not ready for tomorrow's math test.
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The day the power of love overrules the love of power, the world will know peace.
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Life has never given me lemons. It has given me anger issues, anxiety, a love for alcohol and a serious dislike for stupid people. But not lemons.
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Grandmas never run out of hugs or cookies.
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My only hobby is laziness, which naturally rules out all others.
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Reputation is made in a moment. Character is built in a lifetime.
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Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
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